wait in peace

What an interesting season this is; what a unique time.

It seems like the last six weeks have been filled with impatient preparation. Pack! Clean! Think! Prepare for every possibility! And now I’m here. Surprisingly, now that I’m smack in the middle of being full-term with this baby, and so close to moving on from the ranch, and on the crest of so much transition, well, I’m finding an expected quiet. It’s actually all…just fine. I know this child is going to enter this crazy crazy world fairly soon, and I don’t really expect to still be pregnant a week from now. But maybe he just needs these extra days tucked in all safe and quiet. Maybe he’s heard me talking about how tricky it can be out here. Maybe he’s a little nervous and just needs that extra moment in his current world to listen to his Father before stepping into this new and next and louder sphere.

I know the trend or perceived norm is for mamas to do their crazy nesting and such right on the brink of birth, but I think I’m different. I remember (now) how I was similar with Jeremiah; cooking, packing, crazy impatient; for weeks beforehand. Then, the night before he was born, I settled in with a book and popcorn and prepared to just cuddle in and wait. I’m nearing that now. I can feel it. I’m aware of a ‘savouring’ of these last days more than an impatience and, despite being pretty tired and constantly in the conversation of transition, finding a growing sense of peace.

This baby is on the way. As far as we know, he’s healthy and safe and physically ready for his entrance. It’ll happen. But until then, I’m alright feeling him snuggle (and smash) under my ribs and knowing that these last days have been gifted to me to hold him this close, for these moments, in our own secret place of Spirit and Mystery, before he opens his eyes upon the new and awful and wondrous new home waiting for him outside of me.

One Response to “wait in peace”
  1. Kimberly says:

    My wee one joined us just over a week ago. Such a sweet time together now. I, too, am savoring each moment and smile and yawn and and and. It is so wonderful after so much worry and stress. I am glad you are enjoying this time. 🙂

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