It’s Time


Two full seasons. Two full cycles of moon and planting and growth and now, harvest. Many nights have passed since I’ve come to this space to write and share and Open.

Can you believe I left this space way back at the Spring Equinox? Far back before the seeds sprouted or the heat and storms of summer raged? When I stepped away, my Other was still stationed up north, stepping back home for only days in the month. When I paused this screen, I didn’t know that my newest youngling, only weeks old, would fall ill and be bound to home oxygen for ten weeks. When I chose to fall back into the quiet, I was expectant…yet not aware of the great need for space and thought and stillness.

And now, I’m back. And so many weeks have tumbled along and inches have been added to those three warrior boys and that man now serves the county and the lives within it and I, this woman yet desiring wholeness, has bent and grown and pondered.

And here I am. Hmm. Breathe in.

I’ve missed it…
to a point.

I’ve also found a deep solace, focus, clarity, and re-vision in the space between here and there. Who knew there were so many good things to fill the extra minutes? Who knew there were so many points of self to consider and discard (and consider and…), issues to be wrestled, and events to be processed…and felt. Every moment away from this screen has been, in many ways, more thoroughly lived and breathed and shared then if it had found its existence through text and screen.

Yet, it is good to be back. I’m glad to be here.

Why?

There is a part of me; a voice; who finds its existence through writing. Sure, it’s always there, somewhere in me; slumbering or simmering or wandering about; but it only finds true motion when text on paper or screen give form and shape to her soul. I found that my extended time away from this screen space also led to an extended quieting of that voice.

And, there are some things that can be, and now and then should be, shared in the tumbling journeying. Some. As I stumble and consider and process, I write through them. These glimpses will often find their way to this space.
(Hm, yet again, at the same time, the longer I have been away from this blog, the more I have come to despise blogging. That statement won’t make sense to most, but I’ve come to believe that blogging can lead to some damaging and/or limiting expressions of self. I won’t unpack that here, but I do know I need to be vigilant in my use of this space as I seek to ‘write outwards’ even as I live inwards. There is danger and deception hungry for our ears and eyes; that longing for affirmation, that confusion of community, that desire to be heard.)

So now what?

I have no grand scheme. I did no fancy reno’. I don’t (yet) have a line-up of contributors. For now, this place will exist as a place of voice and Sight. I will post on Mondays and perhaps, occasionally, have contributors or other posts on Thursdays and/or Saturdays. I will write through life and to give Life.

Perhaps you will join the conversation or find a common thread. I carefully accept your words and comments and am open to your story and needs.  You are welcome to sign up for the emails (or however this platform currently works) but be wary and remember: there is only One to follow, One to whom we subscribe. Oh how wretchedly somber and dramatic…ha! Yet how very true. I will write and the seasons will spin and someday we shall die, and perhaps my words as well, so let us drink our cups and give thanks: The gifts of God for the people of God, thanks be to God!

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Comments
3 Responses to “It’s Time”
  1. Kmarie says:

    Welcome back… There are many Perspectives to blogging just like there are many perspectives to normal conversation and living life;) if you find expression in writing but yet feel a strong dislike too maybe there are other mediums for you? Perhaps articles? I could see you writing holistic living articles and submitting;)
    Unless this is like your journal and other places are used for writing. So many people do use blogging do differently. Some are for me (ways of blogging) others aren’t. Just like in life- some beliefs / ways if living aren’t for me while others are YET those ways that are not for me may be highly valuable and inspiring to others and I hope to continually keep that in mind;)
    Sounds like you figured out what works for you. I know many bloggers who quit during spring summer in busy months and start up for the boring or slower reflection seasons of fall and winter. That works;) whatever fits your life best is a lovely idea.
    I like the gift of you and am excited to partake in fall celebration with you Tom night;) it will be nice;)
    So glad j is near by now and babes are doing better!
    I just wanted you to know you are heard. In any form, those that care will listen. Those that need something different can gently move on or find another way. Aren’t we lucky to live in a culture of so many differing views and communication choices;)?
    As you stated, there are downsides but I also find that adds to the beauty because of the tension in that thought;)
    Great thoughts. See you soon;)

  2. ThisMama says:

    welcome back friend! I have missed your words here. You are right, this blogging world can be a little bit of minefield with it’s propensity (sp?) toward inward focus and affirmation but it is also such a beautiful source of growth and community. I think that there is always a need to think about why you write what you write but also just enjoy!
    Love you friend.

  3. The Tea Bag says:

    I’m glad you’re back.

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