Where the wild things are

{Note: While the focus of this post is on boys, it is in no way intended to minimize the beautiful wild of girls. There are times when I simply need to focus and write from where I am and what I see, without ‘disclaiming’ and ‘qualifying’ all other perspectives and potentials. YES, girls are beautiful and wild and strong, yes they leap and crash. But for today, I write about my wild boys for I am the mother of sons and my daughters are yet held by God.}

I am the mother of sons. I have given birth to three growling, tumbling, man-boys. On most days, I am three steps and a ‘y’ chromosome behind. These younglings are boys! Such boys. They leap! They crash! They test everything! I have given birth to three young warriors, three future-knights, three sons of the king who literally simmer with zeal and questions and sparring strengthw

What is a mama to do when the house is running rampant with man-cubs?

I have learned that some of the best things on earth are the wild ones. I am [slowly] learning to embrace the wild and love it for its beauty and magnificent force. A domestic berry may be larger, but the wild ones are the sweetest. A city garden is attractive, but a meadow swirling with the color and hum of that sudden bloom is breathtaking. A roller coaster is exhilarating, but white water or a mountain top or sudden storm: they are beyond a thrill. The wild things and the wildlings and the wild itself offer something that is so attractive yet so dangerous. A cougar. A tornado. A forest without a street. An experience with no off switch.


Raising wildlings is dangerous. It’s not pretty and it’s barely permissible. Wildlings don’t fit into the domestic world. We need these pups trimmed, dainty, appropriate, and domesticated. If we can tame them early they’ll be acceptable citizens by the time they come of age. Once they have surrendered their swords and capes, they’ll be fully ready to be neutered, harnessed, and caged into their appropriate role and calling, just in time to procreate and guide their own sons towards the carousel where their pink speckled mare awaits.

As a mama in a den of searching sons, I am learning to love the wild.

And of course, there is balance as even the wilderness lives within cycles, seasons, and order.
No, we will not allow or teach cruelty or insensitivity or false bravado.
No, we will not stand back if they misapply strength, speak evil against a brother, or ignore a neighbor.
No, we will not let the idea that “boys will be boys” permit a devaluing of women or expressions of evil.


In their wild and growing foray into life’s adventure, these boys will understand the value of life, of defense, of courage, of strength. Sure, they will learn proper hygiene and the social necessities allowing them mobility within society. But they will also be invited to spar and spear. They will feel the strength of their Papa in both his towering discipline and his tender concern. They will be handed boots and buckets and pointed towards mud and puddle. They will be guided towards the Good and the full picture of God.
They will be given the freedom to push and discover a force Who cannot be moved.

And their mama will watch with wide eyes and clenched prayers shouting, “Good job sweetie! Yes! [oh Lord have mercy…oh honey…oh no not the head…Ohhhh!!] YAY SWEETIE!”

And one day my teeny babes will tumble headfirst into manhood. They will stride forward; not sulking for all that hasn’t been handed to them on tarnished platters, not waiting for the other to extend the peace first, not sitting until the dragon dies and the princess walks from the tower; but as men who have been invited to reach higher, dig deeper, stand stronger.

Wild sons fighting battles and expressing strength.
Wild sons knowing Justice and defending as heroes.
Wild sons feeling heat and fervor yet living in Wisdom and Mercy.
Wild sons tempted and choosing yet searching out the bigger questions and the One Answer.

Wild sons worshipping an untamed God.

5 Responses to “Where the wild things are”
  1. Marissa says:

    I love this. If I had a son, this is what I would want for him.
    I don’t think that you ever need apologize for sharing your perspectives on raising your little men. That from a mama who is raising three girls! Though funnily enough I just wrote my thoughts on raising them yesterday.:)

    • Dea' says:

      Thanks Marissa! I find it difficult sometimes to write from a perspective of ‘solely sons’ or ‘solely woman’ etc., as I’ve often had to wade through comments of “Sure, but…!”. There are times when I feel like declaring, “Yes, of course there’s balance and yes I recognize the whole picture but I’m writing an article not a book!” So, thanks 😉 (and now I’ll have to check yours out 😉 )

  2. Brenda says:

    It’s true, Dea’ — boys are so amazingly, wonderfully “other” than their mothers!

  3. Marissa says:

    Hey, I just noticed that the crown that I made for Jeremiah made it into a couple of your pictures! 🙂

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